The person we marry is supposed to be the one we trust the most in the world. After all, didn’t our marriage vows include a line or two about trust and faithfulness? So, when you find yourself in a position whereby you don’t fully trust your spouse, it can be disconcerting to say the least.
When we face the loss of trust of someone we love, it can be difficult to put our finger on exactly why we no longer trust them. It may be something about the way they are acting. What they say – or don’t say. Regardless of how we come to the realization that we no longer trust our spouse, it can be a very painful realization, indeed. It leads to thoughts of the worst nature, such as wondering whether he or she may be cheating. Wouldn’t it be nice to know the truth? Only by knowing the truth will we be in a position to do something about it.
If you are asking yourself, “Why can’t I trust my spouse?”, here are 5 signs that they may be cheating:
1. Their schedule seems to include missing time:
The term “missing time” has become popularized by modern tales of UFO abduction. But, it can be applied in a much more mundane way to our daily lives. That is, when our spouse recounts their day or week to us but somehow leaves out large blocks of time. Maybe they don’t totally skip anything, but they sort of gloss over key parts. This type of behavior, if frequent, might mean that they are covering up something going on behind your back.
2. They come home with strange scents on their clothes:
If you have noticed that your spouse smells differently lately, you might have initially chalked it up to maybe their having a new co-worker with strong perfume or cologne. Or, maybe they have suddenly befriended a smoker somewhere along the way. Or, possibly they frequently come home smelling like an Italian restaurant (you know the smell) but you don’t remember having any fettuccine lately. Of course, the presence of a new smell on your spouse could merely be a sign of something absolutely benign. Or, it could mean that something is going on right under your nose.
3. They don’t look you in the eye when they say they love you:
If your spouse seems to be giving you less eye contact lately, that could be a sign that something is up. Eye contact is a subtle but important part of human communication. Turning away from eye contact just a bit too early could be a sign that your spouse is hiding something in his or her heart that they don’t want you to see. The next time you are with your spouse, look into his or her eyes for just an extra second or two longer than you normally do and see how they respond.
4. They fumble their words when you ask where they have been:
Of course, nobody likes to be checked up on every few minutes or hours: we all need our private moments. Still, when you ask your spouse about their day, you would expect him or her to be pretty open in answering that question. If your spouse is consistently tight-lipped on this point, it may be cause for concern.
5. They initiate lovemaking in irregular patterns:
Most couples who have been married for some time – for better or worse – fall into a fairly regular pattern of lovemaking. If your relationship had reached that point but now you find your spouse wanting to make love much less or much more often for no apparent reason – that could be a sign that something is going on.
Not being able to trust your spouse can be unsettling. What is worse is to suspect that they might be cheating. If your spouse exhibits one or more of these signs they are cheating, it is time to get to work in fixing your relationship.